As most of you noticed, I didn’t post anythng yesterday. No worries…nothing is wrong. I just wasn’t having the greatest of days and not a whole ton happened. I only had one visitor other than my dad…which actually was kind of nice. Things have been pretty crazy around here and yesterday I had a good solid day to relax a bit. I got some extra rest and some time to just think about things.
My guest yesterday was a friend of mine from Whitewater who moved here from Moldova a couple of years ago. Her name is Marcela. She is by far one of the nicest and most interesting people I have ever met. She gave me a calendar with a picture of me and my old roommates on it…that put a big smile on my face. She also brought in a chicken oriental salad from Applebee’s. Damn, those things are amazing. But right when I saw it, I knew I couldn’t touch it! OH THE AGONY! I can’t eat fresh fruits and vegetables. Thank you for the gifts, Marcela!
Physically, things are beginning to happen that bring back memories…obviously not good ones. Last night, the severe heart burn began. Chemotherapy is designed to destroy cells that divide. Leukemic cells are in that category of cells. However, so are all of the cells that line your entire digestive system. That’s the nasty part of chemo. To kill the bad cells, you have to kill the good as well. It’s the same reason why your hair falls out. It’s the same category of cells that divide.
So as I was saying, last night this heart burn really started to kick in. My digestive system is becoming more and more uncomfortable, but somehow I am still able to eat large portions. In fact, I actually gained a few pounds! To control the heart burn, I took a medley of drugs. They hit it with Oxycodone, some of this Maalox looking stuff, and some Protonix. It seemed to subdue the discomfort and I was actually able to sleep fairly well. However, this morning was just the opposite. I woke up this morning absolutely thrashed. My entire body was fatigued and I could hardly move. Just yesterday I was walking around the BMT unit with my dad for a couple miles and today I was near passing out just standing up. Needless to say, today I took things very easily. I slept most of the day and did my best to recover from whatever kicked my ass the night before (think it was the Oxy).
Later on, my new roommates dropped in and played a card game with me. We had a good time , but I was feeling totally drained by the end of it. My doctor stopped in for a bit and we talked a little bit more about the spinal tap which will be happening tomorrow (Thursday the 3rd). It sounds like something that just has to be done. They will go into my spine, pull out some spinal fluid, and replace the fluid with chemotherapy. They will test the fluid that they extract to see if any of the leukemia has gotten into my brain, and if so, they will give me treatment accordingly.
Dawn brought in some food tonight from Applebee’s. I blame her for me gaining weight. Cheesecake from The Cheesecake Factory, Cinnabons, steak from Applebee’s…I think I am the first patient to gain weight from one day to the next! Pretty soon here I doubt I will be able to eat anything, so I suppose gaining weight now is good!
Feeling pretty burned out so I think I am going to hang it up for the night. I know I didn’t write anything yesterday. And I guarantee that there will be more days where I don’t write. But I will do my best to write down whatever thoughts or feelings are going on, on a fairly routine basis.