Cari Blog 24

Hey Everyone,

It’s been awhile since I’ve written a “Cari Blog.”  Truth is, things have been crazy, and I just haven’t had the energy.  Eric wrote a really long blog the other day, pretty much summing up from the last transplant, all the way until here.  We’ve been in and out of this hospital non-stop for more than a month.  It seems like every time we go home, we get one good day there, and have to come back.  I’ve actually jokingly referred to our real house as our “vacation home.”  Looking back at our whole marriage, Eric and I think we’ve honestly spent more time at this hospital, than our own home. 

The last blog I wrote said that the Leukemia was out of his brain after two clear tests.  It actually came back in the next test, (one cell…seriously..one cell.) and we started the Lumbar punctures all over again.  After it came back twice with the same result of “one cell” in the cerebral spinal fluid, the last one they did on Tuesday, came back clear again!!  The other problem though, is that we are still wondering what exactly is going on in the bone marrow.  Eric’s counts haven’t come up enough to test out how much leukemia , if any is in there….so right now, we’re living on hope!

Eric was discharged from the hospital last week, only to come back in pretty much the next day.  For those of you who know Eric first hand, you know that he will tell them he doesn’t want to be here and wants to go home.  I believe the quote to the doctor one time was, “ I AM going home today.”  He doesn’t want to be here, and I don’t blame him one bit.  Even though the staff is amazing, we would both much rather he be home.  I am so proud of Eric for recognizing that he NEEDED to be back in the hospital, and we called some family friends (Thank you Mardy and Brian)  to drive us in.  For the first time I think in forever, Eric admitted himself to the hospital.  He had been coughing a lot, which led to coughing up some blood, and some major side pain.  Eric and I spent the rest of that night/morning waiting for xrays, and tests to come back.  We were told the next morning that Eric had pneumonia.   What’s weird is, at his appointment that day they told him that his coughing wasn’t a big deal unless he had a fever.  He never had a fever.

Today (Friday) we were supposed to maybe go home thinking that his infection was clearing up, he wasn’t coughing as much, and wasn’t in as much pain.  Our day turned out to be a little different.  We found out that the infection Eric had in his lungs, may not have been what we thought it was, and that some of the samples of things that were sent to the lab, were coming back as “fungal infections.”  I went home to take a shower, while Eric stayed at the hospital to get a bronchoscopy.   I’ve never had one of these, but they don’t sound fun.   I’ve had an endoscopy, and the only similar thing that I’m seeing between the two, is that a tube is inserted into your throat.  Poor Eric was not put out completely for this and remembers the whole thing….just like last time he had to have one, but he told me this time was worse.  I’m not sure how much more this guy can take.  I am amazed at how physically he’s handling it like a champ.  Hopefully the bronchoscopy tells us something!!

Eric and I both, even though we’ve even seen doctors seem to give up hope…still have some.  Eric’s doctor is pretty optimistic on things right now, even admitting he wasn’t for a bit, but that it’s coming back.  I know Eric and I both went through a period thinking, “this is it…” but we’re both not ready to say it is.  I can’t begin to describe how proud of his strength and determination I am.   Eric is one of the most amazing people in this world.  I am by far the luckiest girl in the world to be married to him.  There was a point there where I was out for a couple days, and literally slept on the cot in his hospital room non-stop for 24 hours.  Last night, I came here from dance, fell onto the cot, and slept until Eric woke me up to remind me to take my pills, as soon as I opened my eyes, I looked over and there was a brownie, and a diet mountain dew waiting for me.  (This is part of how I take my pills every night.  Something to wash it down with, and some form of brownie, or m&m to wash it down with)  Eric, when he was sick and in the hospital, still did everything he could to make sure I was Okay, and to take care of me.  I am very very lucky to be married to such an amazing man.  Eric would honestly do anything for anyone, just to get a smile.

Thank you again from the bottom of our hearts for everything you guys out there have done for us.  I know I always end my blog with this, but for real, you guys and your love and support are really what keeps us going, and it means the world to us!!

Love,

Cari

Quote

  • The reason that these years have been the best is that I think that I might have had a somewhat positive impact on your lives and perhaps your understanding of what cancer is and what it can do, to both those of us that it has personally attacked and those of us who know someone who is going through it. -Eric McLean
  • I just want children to be left with a better life than what I was left with," he said. "I want them to experience the feeling I had in my life when I realized that I really mattered.
    ~ Larry Hisle
  • Realistically, I have two more Olympic cycles in me. I'm not going to let this beat me.  I've gained a lot of strength from you guys, if Eric can fight 5 times over I can overcome this one year of setbacks.
    ~ Chris Solinsky
  • Strange is our situation here upon earth. Each of us comes for a short visit, not knowing why, yet sometimes seeming to divine a purpose. From the standpoint of daily life, however, there is one thing we do know: that man is here for the sake of other men. ~ Albert Einstein
  • Never, never, never give up.
    ~ Winston Churchill
  • I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me! ~ Dr. Seuss
  • Once you choose hope, anything's possible.
    ~ Christopher Reeve
  • If you're going through hell, keep going.
    ~ Winston Churchill